The Memories She Once Knew
by LostInOurTranslation
Summary: Years after The Avengers, Natasha is involved in an accident leaving her unable to remember anything that has happened in the past few years. How can she remember the memories which she once knew, when something much darker is happening right now. Clint/Natasha
1. Chapter 1

**Here's the first chapter I hope you like it!**

**I've wanted to do this for ages but never really got the words out. Hopefully this is okay. (The first chapter's always the hardest to write)**

**Enjoy.**

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Pain spread through her forehead causing her to wince. It was weird to think that something could cause her to make such a pathetic vulnerable sound, such as a wince. Pain usually wasn't an issue for Natasha, she made sure of that. Growing up in a lifestyle like hers, she had to be strong- she had to ignore the pain.

But here she was wincing.

One thing scared Natasha more than the pain spreading throughout her head.

The fact that she had no idea what caused it.

Voices around her startled her, causing her to snap open her eyes.

The bright lights around her blinded her eyes, as she slowly made out the images of the room she was lying in.

A hospital.

Why was she in hospital? As far as she could remember she wasn't due for any missions due to her injuries from the _Loki Incident. _Fury had given her some much needed time off- not that she wanted it. There was nothing more boring than staying at home, knowing that she could be doing something useful with her time. So what had caused her to get enough injuries to be emitted into a hospital?

Two men stood at the foot of her bed staring up at her. The one closest to her was a doctor, who smiled down at her speaking too quickly for Natasha to understand. His voice came out in slurred muffled sounds to her ears- not registering as words.

His friendly face glanced from her huddled figure in the bed back to the other man standing next to him. Slowly Natasha attempted to get up, ignoring the warning sounds coming from the machine hooked to her arms. The doctor ran closer to her struggling to stop her from moving too violently.

She needed to contact Fury and ask him what the hell was going on.

Why was she in a hospital?

And how come she had no memory of how she obtained so many injuries.

A pain shot up her side causing her to lose her breath. She'd done some serious damage.

More doctors ran into the room forcing her down in the bed, as the warning signal from the machine finally switched off. The doctor gently pushed her back into the bed frowning down at her. Natasha sighed allowing her body to relax.

If these people were going to force her to stay in bed, she might as well play along.

Slowly she shut her eyes allowing the darkness to descend on her once more.

Natasha thought back to the last thing she remembered.

It was the day after Loki's attack, she'd watched him being taken away back to Asgard with Thor.

She had no idea how long she'd been sleeping before she felt warmth on her hand causing her to open her eyes again with shock, she looked up to the man holding her hand.

Clint Barton.

Her friend, her ally- her partner was holding her hand.

Confusion spread through her as she analysed his expression. Natasha had never seen him look like this. His eyes were huge with worry, as his forehead wrinkled showing signs of stress. Clint was never worried. Even when they were fighting Loki and were hugely outnumbered he stayed calm and acted like it didn't effect him.

Yet here he was holding her hand and staring at her like the world was ending.

Something bad had happened, that was the only explanation to why Clint was looking at her like that.

Natasha opened her mouth preparing to speak, but her dry throat croaked in return.

Clint smiled releasing his grip on her hand. Slowly he turned to the small bedside table next to him and handed Natasha a glass of water. "Here, drink this". He said holding the cool glass to her hand. "The doctors said you're dehydrated".

Natasha frowned taking the glass of water that he handed to her, slowly she held the cool glass up to her lips and sipped at the water. Her eyes never leaving his.

Why was he looking at her like that?

She coughed quickly ignoring the pain in her chest, as she turned around placing the glass back on the table. She noticed her hand was shaking as she struggled to keep a calm presence.

"Clint". She whispered attempting to speak normally. "What happened?".

She watched as a flash of hurt went through her friends face as he took in her words. Quickly he hid his emotion, sitting up straighter in his chair.

"Nat, you were in an accident". He whispered frowning at the young assassin in the bed, his eyes glanced over her body noticing the dark bruises appearing on the pale skin of her head.

Natasha swallowed attempting to keep her breathing steady, she had to keep herself calm or the machine hooked to her body would bring the all-too friendly doctor back into the room.

She frowned feeling her head go dizzy. "An accident?". She whispered struggling to put together any memory of an accident.

"The doctors said you might have some gaps in your memory". He whispered stroking her hair softly. "How much do you remember of last night?".

"Nothing". She heard herself say.

She felt sick.

So many questions were left unanswered.

How did she get so many injuries without any explanation to how she retrieved them.

Why was Clint acting so strange, holding her hand and stroking her hair.

Where was Director Fury, surely he should have been here to tell her what happened.

"Where's Fury?". She whispered panicking at the thought of him being injured as well. "What happened last night, Clint?". She asked struggling to get up, ignoring the flash of pain she leant forward swinging her legs over the bed.

Clint frowned placing his hands firmly on her shoulders holding her into place. No way was he letting her walk around- not when her injuries were so bad. He looked at the red-heads face feeling lost.

"What are you talking about Nat?". He asked searching her eyes for information, she looked so alarmed and sad, but nothing she was saying was making any sense to him.

She stared back at Clint feeling her pulse quicken as her blood pumped harshly through her veins.

"Was it something to do with Loki?". She breathed feeling her breath hitch in her throat. "Did he come back?". She asked feeling herself panic at the thought of an attack so soon to the last one.

This time Natasha watched as Clint's face couldn't hide the pain. His eyes grew large with recognition.

"Loki." He whispered under his breath holding back the tears that had formed in his eyes. "But that was-

The same male doctor came bursting through the doors interrupting Clint. "How are we doing here?". He asked glancing at Natasha and Clint. "Our machines told us that you tried to get up again Miss Romanoff". He frowned raising his eyebrows.

Instantly Natasha wanted to kick him in the face, she was finally getting somewhere with Clint, and he interrupted them, leaving her with none of her questions answered.

"Now." He said lowering his voice. "How are you feeling Miss Romanoff".

Natasha scowled at the doctor, feeling every muscle in her body twitching, slowly she swung her legs back into the bed feeling Clint's grip on her arms loosen.

"Not great". She muttered rolling her eyes. "I cant remember how I got here". She said feeling as empty as she sounded.

She watched as Clint turned his face away from her, hiding his emotion from her. What could have happened to effect him so badly? It's not like he meant anything other than a friend to her.

The doctor nodded bringing her attention away from Clint. "Well that's not uncommon, give it some time and I'm sure you'll remember everything". He smiled.

Natasha sighed not wanting to argue with this over enthusiastic doctor, all she wanted was to speak to Barton alone.

"All you need now is some sleep". He continued distracting her from her thoughts, slowly he leant down to one of the wires connected to the tubes to her veins.

"What are you doing?". She protested attempting to move her arm away in time. She hated needles.

The doctor smiled holding her arm down tight. If Natasha was in any other condition she could have easily stopped him from injecting her. But for some reason her body wasn't cooperating- she felt sleep deprived and achy. Her muscles were sore and tired.

"I'm just giving you a little something to help you sleep". He muttered as she felt the cold liquid swim through her veins.

Slowly she turned to face Clint searching his eyes for the answers she so desperately needed.

"Clint". She whispered feeling her body cooperate with the medicine, shutting down her senses. Darkness surrounded her vision as she felt Clint's hand hold hers once more.

It was strange to think how comforting his hand felt on hers.

She wanted to ask him so many things.

But it was too late. Sleep had caught up with her.

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"How's she doing?". Tony asked standing at the doorway of Natasha's room, he watched as Clint sat by her side staring at her peaceful face. Natasha's bright hair stood out against her pale skin, causing Tony to smile slightly.

She'd always stood out from the crowd.

How she ever became a assassin he'd never know.

"Not good". Clint whispered staring up at the billionaire, tears welling in his eyes. "She doesn't remember".

Tony frowned walking further into the room, carefully he laid a huge vase of flowers next to Natasha's bed before turning back to Clint.

The look in his friends eye said it all.

He'd never seen Clint look so broken- so lost.

The strong friend which he'd known for years had never looked this defeated, his face looked paler than usual, and his eyes looked older- like he'd added years onto his age.

"What do you mean she doesn't remember?". Tony said glancing at the redhead sleeping in the bed. His eyes wondering over the dark purple bruise appearing faintly above Natasha's eye.

Clint swallowed feeling his throat go dry, his heart beat sadly in his chest as he struggled to speak without his voice cracking. "She doesn't remember anything". He said hearing himself say it for the first time since Natasha had mentioned Fury's name.

It sounded weird to say it out loud.

Things had gone so wrong last night, and he had only himself to blame.

"_Anything?"._Tony said feeling his body go numb. "Jesus, what did she say when she woke up?".

Clint stood up leaning over Natasha's small body, carefully he stroked her face feeling the familiar soft skin under this numb.

"She asked me where Fury was, she thought Loki was the reason she's in hospital". He muttered feeling a cold tear run down his face. Immediately he rubbed it away before turning back to Stark, he stared into the brown eyes of his friend not wanting to conform his worst nightmares. "She's forgotten years of her life".

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**Thanks for reading!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Thanks for the reviews, I'm glad you guys like it so far!**

**Enjoy,**

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Clint's words rang in her ears.

"Loki?". He whispered shocked at the name. It was like he'd barely remembered the attack- but surely Loki was the reason she was in hospital. "But that was-

He'd been cut off by the impatient doctor, but his face had said it all.

Think.

What was the last thing that you can remember Natasha.

The'd just seen Loki go home, with his ridiculous muzzle, and then Fury gave them all some time off- cue Tony's pleads for them all to go to the shawarma restaurant.

_The shawarma restaurant. _

She remembered that Clint had done some serious damage to his body- he had after all fallen through a window. Yet he'd insisted that he was fine, and persuaded her to go to the restaurant with the others. None of them had spoken but she gave Clint the look telling him that he needed to go to a hospital- he'd stared back at her, insisting that nothing was wrong.

Her heart tugged at the thought of Clint.

That's all she could remember.

Her stomach fell at the thought of all the important memories she'd lost.

Something must have happened between the time of her going home, and her ending up in this godforsaken hospital. But why couldn't she remember?

Her dry throat distracted her from the ongoing worries.

Carefully she opened her eyes, peeking around the small white room.

To her delight it was empty. It gave her some time to figure out what was going on.

Natasha sat up in the bed and turned to the small wooden table beside her once more, her warm sheets falling to her waist. The same glass was there, filled with more water and ice but to her surprise beside it stood a vase full of a variety of different wild flower each showing a different shade of Scarlett red, matching her hair.

She smiled gently reaching out to touch the soft petals of each flower smoothing over the distinctive texture.

No one knew how much she actually like flowers. She never really got close enough to tell anyone the things she liked in life.

With her job being so tough, she had to keep to herself. Never letting anyone get close to her. It was one of the reasons she liked her job- if you let anyone get close to you, it gives them the opportunity to hurt you. But here she was laying beside a vase full of her favourite flowers.

She frowned leaning down to drink the ice cold water, none of this was making sense. Quickly she slammed the glass back onto the table ignoring the flowers. If she was ever going to remember what happened she'd have to get out of the hospital. No way would the doctor agree to letting her go so early, so she'd have to leave quickly- before anyone realised she was gone.

Natasha looked down at the wires connecting her to the machines. This was going to hurt.

Quickly she yanked them out of her arms, ignoring the stinging sensation running through her body, she'd been through worse.

Getting up was harder than she anticipated and the pain through her side was worse than before, her head was spinning and it took a couple of seconds of leaning on the bedside table and breathing deeply before she could stand again. She glanced around the room searching for any signs of clothes, no way was she leaving the hospital in the patient gown. Her eyes landed on a pile of neatly folded clothes which were placed on the small plastic chair next to her bed.

Clint had probably left them there for her.

Natasha walked over to the pile of clothes not bothering to look them over- it didn't matter what they looked like she just needed to go.

Her eyes wandered to the door connecting her room to another one.

Thank God for SHIELD's medical insurance, so she could have her own private bathroom. Quickly she shuffled into the small bathroom switching on the light as she locked the door. The room was small, only containing the bare essentials- a toilet, sink and mirror.

She looked at the woman staring at her in the huge mirror, and immediately her stomach fell.

The woman in the mirror didn't look like _her._

Natasha's once short red hair had grown, it fell in wavy ringlets reaching her shoulders framing her pale face. Her huge eyes looked different, bigger than before? The person she once knew was gone, and in her place was an older wiser version of Natasha. Everything she knew was questioned. Was this some sick joke that Stark was playing on her?

"Stay calm". She whispered watching herself in the mirror, her eyes glancing at the purple bruise above her eyebrow. Gingerly she touched it feeling the harsh shot of pain burst through her forehead again. "Everything's fine". She tried to tell herself.

Quickly she got dressed not daring to look at her reflection again. She was glad for the long sleeved jumper and jeans left for her on the seat, the warm clothes hugged her body and stopped the shivers from flowing through her skin.

Instantly she left the bathroom, not wanting to see herself in the mirror again.

Thankfully she was still alone in her room when she came out. No one had been in since she was changing.

Natasha ignored the stinging feeling in her eyes as she slipped out of her room making her way to the exit of the hospital. She was used to this kind of thing, being unseen. Nobody was going to question her leaving the hospital- at least this part of her life would be easy. She walked through the busy hospital, thankful that her identity was somehow hidden even after the whole Loki attack.

Carefully she reached into the pockets of her jeans searching for any money or keys she could use for transportation.

Her pockets were empty.

The cool breeze touched her face as she walked out of the familiar hospital. At least she knew where she was.

Her best bet for answers was SHIELD's main warehouse. Fury would tell her what happened, and why everyone was acting so strange towards her.

Natasha continued walking through the streets of New York thankful for the strong boots left for her in the hospital, by now the doctors would know that she'd gone and would be looking for her.

But she didn't care.

All she wanted was answers. If Loki was back then the threat towards the world was huge, and SHIELD would need her back on her feet as fast as possible.

Her eyes wandered round the streets of New York, everyone seemed so calm and normal. It was like the attack from Loki had never happened.

The loud noise of a sports car rang through her ears as Natasha continued walking down the familiar road. The screech of tires caused her to spin around, facing the person who had clearly stopped beside her.

Tony stared up at the confused red head watching her angered expression, his sun glasses pointed downwards as he stared wide eyed at her.

Quickly he got out of the car ignoring the green light in front of him. "Nat". He whispered walking up to Natasha, gently placing his hands on her shoulders. Why was everybody touching her like that? "What are you doing out of the hospital, everyone's looking for you". He shouted staring into her eyes.

Why would everyone look for her?

"Stark." She said firmly shaking his hands off her arms. "I need to talk to Fury, I've got gaps in my memory". She said ignoring the same hurt look in his eyes. Why was everybody acting so sad around her.

"Jesus, you can say that again". He muttered running his hand through his brown wavy hair. "You're not going anywhere alone though, come with me". He said gesturing to the black sports car.

Natasha squinted at Tony wondering why he was so keen to get her off the streets of New York. "Tony, stop." She said fiercely. "I have to go and find Fury- something's obviously happened with Loki".

Tony licked his lips nervously watching the red head walk off in front of him.

He really didn't want to push her too much, but he couldn't just watch her leave.

"Look around you Natasha". Tony called making the young assassin stop in her tracks. "Do you really think the attack with Loki was yesterday ". He said squinting in the sun.

Natasha froze glancing at the people in the street around her, everyone was normal. There was no destroyed buildings no rubble on the ground. It was like the fight with Loki had never happened.

"There's no destroyed buildings- everything is back to normal". He said hating himself for putting her through so much pain.

Natasha spun around facing Tony, tears making it's way up to her eyes. She watched as he stared unhappily back at her, careful not to push her too far. She walked slowly back to him, feeling her world crumble around her.

"What are you talking about". She whispered already knowing what he would say next.

Tony sighed rubbing the back of his head uncomfortably. "The fight with Loki was 3 years ago, Nat." He whispered watching her face.

"You're a liar!". She screamed ignoring the tear that fell down her cheek, she didn't have time for Stark's stupid games, she needed to find Fury.

Tony shook his head running after the small red head, he placed his hand on her arm spinning her around to face him. After all this time did she just forget everything that had happened with them.

"Stop." He whispered pulling her back to him. "I'm telling you the truth Natasha". He whispered as she stared into his brown eyes.

He was telling the truth.

"No". She whispered feeling her legs grow weak beneath her, gently Tony placed his arms around her waist allowing her to lean into him. He stoked her hair softly feeling the small woman shake beneath him.

"I'm sorry". Tony whispered carefully walking Natasha back to his car.

She could feel her body betraying her as her head pounded. Natasha looked up at Tony quickly, feeling herself fall. "Don't take me back there". She whispered falling to the ground.

Tony watched as Natasha fainted in his arms. The toughest woman he knew had fainted.

But who could blame her, she'd lost years of her life.

Gently he bent down to pick up the short red head, feeling her light body weight beneath his arms. He turned to place her in the passengers seat of his car, making sure to buckle her in. Quickly he sat in the seat next to Natasha glancing at the sleeping woman in the chair.

"Jarvis". He whispered turning on the car. "Sent a message to Barton, tell him we found her".

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**Review?**

**So what did you think? I'm trying to save the big details until later!**

**But hopefully you guys like the story so far! Don't worry Clint will be in the next chapter ;) **

**If you guys didn't guess so far, something's happened to SHIELD and Natasha has a _lot_ to remember!**


	3. Chapter 3

**I hope everyone had a great Easter! Thank you for reviewing and following the story so far.**

**Enjoy**

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Natasha felt numb.

How could anyone react normally knowing that they'd missed years off of their life?

It was something out of a horror story- something meant for the movies. Things like this weren't supposed to happen to people like her. She was strong fearless and independent. She didn't just _forget _things whenever she got a bump to the head.

Quickly, she opened her eyes staring at the cream roof above her head. Her body was laying on a huge soft sofa in the middle of a rather large room.

At Least she wasn't in the hospital anymore.

She sat up quickly ignoring the spinning feeling in her head, her eyes darted around the room taking in all of the expensive furniture, before finally land on Tony's figure standing a few metres away from her.

He had an anxious look on his face- worried about how she was going to react to him again.

"Hey". He whispered roughly, clearing his throat.

Natasha sighed glancing around the room. It resembled the same room she'd spent undercover as Stark's personal assistant- but everything had changed. The furniture was new, different to the ones she'd memorised a few months ago.

"So, it wasn't a bad dream then?". She whispered meeting his worried glance again.

Tony rubbed the back of his head nervously glancing at the door before replying Natasha. "I'm afraid not sweetheart". He muttered walking slowly towards her.

"Stop looking so nervous Stark, I'm not going to faint on you again". She smiled trying to ease the tension in the room.

It wasn't working.

Tony looked rough, the dark circles under his eye proved it. His brown hair sprayed out in messy waves. "Natasha". He whispered looking down. "I'm sorry about before I shouldn't have just forced it out on you".

What the hell was this? Tony Stark feeling guilty about being to upfront. Things were not normal.

"What are you talking about?". She glared at him feeling her temper rise. "You did what was right Stark, I wasn't thinking straight".

Tony walked towards Natasha silently staring at her face intently.

Something about the way he looked at her made her feel uneasy.

"Someone needs to take a look at your head, Nat". Tony said leaning down to the sitting woman.

"You need to tell me everything first". Natasha said squinting her eyes at him. No way was she going back to the hospital without learning some of the information that she'd forgotten.

Tony swallowed glancing at the door once more. He wanted to wait until Clint arrived, if not he could potentially scar Natasha more than help her.

"I cant". He said not looking at her face.

She frowned standing up to face Tony, she ignored the pain that still ached through her side. "Why not?". She shouted angry at him for leading her on.

"Because!". Tony shouted facing Natasha. "You've been through so much these past few years- I don't want to hurt you!". He said feeling his heart speed up at the side of her confused expression. "Natasha, you've forgotten so much". He whispered.

"Since when did you care what anyone else thought? You know it's the right thing to do". She said fiercely narrowing her eyes once more. "Who's stopping you from telling me the truth?". She shouted holding out her hands at him.

"I am". A voice from the door startled the pair, causing them both to turn at the man in the doorway.

Clint stood frowning at the two adults shouting at each other. It was like a blast from the past. His stomach dropped at Natasha's expression, she looked so confused and hurt but obviously she was trying to hide it.

"Barton". She said walking quickly towards him, noticing how his eyes softened at the sight of her. "What the hell is going on?".

He looked at Tony who walked behind Natasha slowly, he just shrugged in reply.

"Nat, you've forgotten years of your life". Clint said slowly.

"I know!". She said feeling herself get angrier and angrier. "Everyone keeps telling me that-

"The most important years of your life". He cut in analyzing her expression carefully.

The room went silent, as Natasha took in Clint's words.

The most important years of her life?

"What?". She whispered frowning, how could these past few years be the most important years of her life? Everything before the Loki attack was pretty important. "I just need to remember something". She muttered feeling herself grow cold.

"Okay". Clint said touching her arm softly. She wasn't used to so many people feeling worried about her- comforting her. "Lets see what we can do".

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Natasha sat behind the long glass table staring across from the two men.

It felt more like an interrogation that a chat, but it was still something. Whatever memories she'd lost- they'd obviously meant something to Clint and Tony and she needed to found out what they were, _quickly. _"Alright, what are we doing here then?". She said staring at Tony and Clint, her eyes darted to the camera watching her every move.

"We're going to help you remember". Tony said leaning across the table.

Natasha glanced down at his fingers linked together, her eyes widened at the small golden ring on his left finger.

Tony was married.

"I missed your wedding". She said bluntly looking up at Tony's face, he smiled grimly rolling his eyes at the redhead.

"No you didn't". He replied biting his lip anxiously. "You were there alright".

Natasha felt her stomach drop.

The way Tony looked at her, caring about her. It was new, but that didn't mean- it couldn't mean.."Wait." Natasha shouted feeling her cheeks glow pink. "We're not- I'm not.."

"You're not married to Tony, Nat". Clint interrupted his voice a little too harsh.

Tony leant back glancing at Clint, his eyes showing no humour. "Pepper". Tony muttered. "I married Pepper".

Natasha shut her eyes feeling her head ache. It was hard remembering even the smallest memory.

Of course Tony had married Pepper! How could she even think that Tony would marry her.

"Ok, tell me what I've missed". She said feeling the stares from Tony and Clint, the last thing she needed was to feel like an idiot. It wasn't her fault that she'd merely questioned Tony's ring.

"You've missed a lot, Miss Romanoff". Tony winked smiling at Natasha. "How about _you _ask us the questions, and we'll see if we can answer it".

Why did he call her Miss Romanoff. It was a small mistake, but Tony always called her _Agent. _It was her job's title.

"Okay". Natasha sighed staring at Clint, he'd never looked more serious in his life. The glint in his eyes that she'd learnt to love was long gone. "What's the date?".

"11th of April, 2015.". Clint said staring at Natasha, willing her to remember. "It's been 3 years since Loki's attack".

Natasha felt her mouth drop open.

_3 years!_ Why did she think it was only yesterday? Her pulse quickened as the truth sunk in.

She'd lost 3 years of her memories.

"Right." She said feeling her mouth go dry. "So, what happened to make me lose my memory?". She said trying to keep her words from stuttering.

Clint and Tony looked at each other silently questioning whether or not they should tell her.

The look in Clint's eye confirmed Natasha's fears- they weren't going to tell her anything.

"I don't think you're there yet, Nat". Clint whispered staring at the bruised red head sitting in front of him.

She could feel herself losing control- they were wasting precious time.

"So you're not going to tell me anything important". She muttered standing up. "Great, I know Tony's relationship status and the date! Exactly what I wanted". Quickly she walked past Clint and Tony not wanting to spend a minute more that she'd have to in the small room.

She could hear the shouts of Tony and Clint behind her as she ran through the huge mansion.

All she had to do was find something useful- to learn one of the huge memories she'd forgotten.

Clint and Tony were hiding something from her, she could tell.

If they weren't going to tell her, she'd have to find out on her own.

Natasha ran through the slightly familiar rooms of Stark Towers taking note of everything in the room. Her eyes darted along the huge glass table- willing herself to find something. Anything.

Her body froze as her eyes landed on a small silver picture frame, standing on the nearby bookcase.

The photo showed a picture of four people.

Pepper and Tony beaming into the camera with their fingers interlocked, a huge diamond on her finger.

But that wasn't what scared Natasha.

It was the two people standing next to the happy couple.

Natasha gently picked up the photo frame to look closer at the two people standing next to Tony and Pepper.

Her and Clint.

She gasped as her eyes wandered over the photo of him. His arms wrapped around her waist in a comforting way. She was leaning in to him, smiling into the camera."But.." She whispered feeling her hands grow cold.

Tony and Clint walked slowly behind Natasha careful not to interrupt her. She turned around staring at Clint with careful eyes not wanting to confront the truth.

"You and me?". She whispered quietly not want to say it out loud, her body shook slightly.

She watched as the same flash of pain went through Clint's eyes as she stared at him.

"Almost a year and a bit now". He said not looking at Natasha's face. How could she not remember?

She could feel her breathing increase as she thought about Clint.

Deep down she'd always felt something for him, but never dared look into these feelings.

As an assassin you can't fall in love.

You can't let yourself get so vulnerable.

But somehow this version of her had opened up to Clint.

Let herself put them both in danger.

"I need some time alone". She whispered placing the photo down carefully where she found it. Quickly she turned away from the two men, walking back to the room which she'd woken up in.

She couldn't speak to Clint yet. Not when she barely knew what kind of person he'd fallen in love with.

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	4. Chapter 4

**I'm not overly happy with how this chapter turned out, but it's vital to the storyline- so I hope it's okay.**

**Enjoy!**

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"How long has she been in the guest room?". Pepper whispered biting her lip at Tony. Clint and Tony decided it would be best to leave Natasha on her own for a while to get her head around the memories she'd forgotten. Their best bet was to call Pepper, and ask her to come home as soon as possible- she'd know what to do.

"About 3 hours". Tony muttered glancing at the door leading to Natasha's room.

Pepper sighed feeling tears prick in her eyes, it was sad to see her friend hurt like this. Forgetting the person that she'd become.

"How's Clint taking it?". Pepper said glancing at Clint sitting on the huge sofa staring into space. He had no clue what to do.

"Like a champ". Tony muttered leaning towards Pepper, gently pushing a strand of her golden hair away from her eyes. "I don't know what I would do if you'd forgotten me". He whispered linking his arms around her slim waist. "I can't imagine what he feels".

Pepper placed her hands around Tony's neck resting her weight on him. "She'll remember in time, I know she will". she said closing her eyes as her lips met Tony's. Tony sighed gently moving his hands up from the back of her waist to stroke Pepper's face glanced up breaking off the kiss gently. "She just needs us to be there for her- remind her what we meant to her".

Tony smiled rubbing his eyes roughly- they were all tired. After the accident no of them got any sleep. Everyone was on high alerts, waiting to hear what Natasha's fate was.

Tony turned to stare at Clint across the room, his eyes fixated on a spot on the wall. Forcing himself not to take what Natasha did earlier to heart. But it was hard, knowing that the woman you loved felt nothing for you.

"I'm going to talk to her". Pepper whispered causing Tony to look away from Clint. He watched as the red head carefully knocked lightly on the door nearby, not waiting for an answer before walking into the room.

Clint looked up in surprise at the sound of Natasha's door opening- hoping that she'd finally come out to talk to him.

His stomach fell as he watched Pepper walk into the room.

Tony walked towards Clint slowly holding out a glass of water for him. Clint looked up slowly at Tony gratefully taking the glass, he sighed lifting the cool glass to his lips.

"I can't believe this happened". He whispered shaking his head. "I should never have let her go, not after what happened to Fury".

Tony sat down next to Clint raising his eyebrows in frustration. "Don't take it to heart, no one can stop her once she's got an idea in her head".

"You know what I mean Tony." Clint muttered leaning down to rest his elbows on his knees. "I never thought in my life something this drastic could have happened- especially to Nat!". He said glancing at the billionaire from the corner of his eyes. "And now she's convinced that the Loki attack was yesterday."

"She'll remember". Tony said looking at his feet, there was nothing more that he could say to reassure the broken man sitting next to him.

"Maybe she doesn't want to". He whispered frowning. "Maybe her body's blocked out her memory for a reason Tony, the pain she was in after Fury's death was unbearable- this is her way of coping."

"You may think that this is a good this Clint."Tony said shaking his head. "But in all honestly did you see the look on her face when she doubted herself when she thought i'd married her!". Tony laughed sourly, frowning. "I know his death meant a lot to her, but I never so her look more happy than when she was with you". He said pointing at Clint.

"It's not the same". Clint said sighing. "She doesn't love me- not know. Natasha's doubting everything she'd ever believed. She doesn't remotely know the person she became in the 3 years she's lost".

Tony nodded rubbing his cheek in thought of what Clint said. "Well why don't we remind her of the memories she's forgotten? Recreate her favourite moments".

Clint looked up at Tony shocked at the idea, a glint in his eye told Tony that he thought it might work. "Do you think it would help her?". He questioned smiling slightly.

"It can't hurt, she might remember something- if we just give her a little push". Tony smiled feeling himself lighten at the thought. "We could bring her back to your place, keep an eye on her and maybe, just maybe- she'll remember the good parts of her life."

"What about the bad parts?". Clint said narrowing his eyes.

"She'll have to find out one day". Tony muttered glancing at the door containing Pepper and Natasha. "Hopefully after she remembers who she is".

* * *

Pepper braced herself as she walked into the guest room that Natasha was in.

Her eyes wandered around the room until she looked at the redhead sitting on the window chair, her eyes staring out of the window. Clearly she was blocking out the incident earlier.

"Hey Natasha". Pepper said walking further into the room, carefully closing the door behind her. No way was she letting the men come in to stress her out even more. "How are you feeling?".

Natasha turned around to face Pepper, her stomach clenching at the sight of the friendly woman. Her hair looked lighter than she remembered and it was longer, laying past her shoulders.

"I've been better". Natasha said turning back to look out the window.

Obviously in the future her and Pepper had become closer, maybe they were even friends judging by the way they looked in the photo on the coffee table in the hall. But it didn't mean anything to the woman staring out of the window.

They weren't friends. Not now.

She'd woken up and forgotten everything nice memory the pair of them had shared together.

Pepper swallowed watching the redhead, before she silently walked over to sit opposite her on the window chair.

Natasha sighed deeply before turning back to Pepper waiting for her to speak. She'd obviously come in here for a reason, and the quicker they talked the quicker Pepper would leave her alone. "Go on". Natasha insisted.

"What?". Pepper smiled, laughing at the annoyed assassin.

Natasha finally grinned hating the way Pepper was looking at her. "You're loving this aren't you?". She laughed. Finding it impossible to glare at somebody so happy.

"No. What are you talking about?". Pepper laughed staring at Natasha.

"You came in here for a reason, so go a head". She said feeling the empty feeling come back into her stomach.

Pepper stopped smiling, remembering what Tony had told her on the phone. "Well Tony told me that you had some questions, maybe I can answer them instead?".

Natasha narrowed her eyes, trying to figure out what Pepper was talking about. Why would she tell her what was going on, and not Tony. "You'll tell me what the hell is going on". She asked raising her eyebrows. Pepper nodded in reply, smiling at the pale woman.

"Hit me." She said staring at Natasha.

"Okay, how did me and Clint become _a couple?". _Natasha said not looking Pepper in the eyes, it was too embarrassing to even think about her and Clint- not after she ran away from him earlier.

"Right, well basically after the Loki incident you two became close". Pepper said seriously waiting for Natasha to look her in the eyes again. "You both obviously wanted to spend more time with each other after he was compromised".

Natasha felt the butterflies return into her stomach.

She didn't know why she felt nervous at the story of her and Clint, but she did.

"And what? One thing let to another- we ended up like a couple in a cheesy rom-com movie?". Natasha said sarcastically rolling her eyes at the thought of it.

Pepper grinned watching Natasha's expression. "Not exactly". She whispered. "You both were on a mission and you got hurt". Pepper sighed stopping to watch Natasha's face- she couldn't push her to the extreme but she wasn't going to starve her of the memories she longed to remember. "Something about your leg- I don't really know how you got hurt, but you did. Anyway Clint ran up to you and picked you up, of course you protested. He ignored your shouts, and lifted you out of the building until you were about two blocks away from where the mission was taking place."

"What happened?". Natasha whispered mesmerised at Peppers words, she swiftly lifted her knees up to rest her chin on them watching Pepper intently.

Pepper smiled continuing. "He finally put you down on a park bench and lifted up your trousers to look at the wound. Apparently you pushed him away and shouted 'At Least buy me a drink first!'". Pepper laughed. "And he just stared at you, deciding that he might as well kiss you".

"How did I take it?". Natasha said staring at Pepper.

"He told me that at first you just stared at him in shock. When he tried to apologise you just leant up to kiss him again". Pepper said looking at the hurt in Natasha's eyes.

Maybe she shouldn't have told her afterall.

"I looked happy." Natasha said realising her vision had gone blurry by tears. "In the picture. I looked happy."

Pepper sighed feeling terrible. "Your were Natasha- you were so happy".

* * *

**Sorry to leave it there, but the next chapters going to shed a little light onto what happened to Fury. ;)**

**Don't worry we'll get to the Clintasha soon enough.**

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**Thanks for reading!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Thank you for reviewing, it's really encouraged me to keep going with this story!**

**Enjoy.**

* * *

_Bullets were fired in the air around her as Natasha felt the adrenaline pump through her veins. She smiled hiding behind a huge slab of concrete as she watched Clint attack the people aiming at her with his arrows, each one flying delicately in the air with precise precision._

_It had been 3 months since Loki's attack and Natasha had insisted to Fury that she take the cases with Clint, promising him that it was just to stay in touch with her friend- not to create and problematic romances._

_Both her and Fury knew differently._

_Clint Barton would never be just her friend again. Not after her nearly losing him from Loki._

_She grinned as Clint caught her stare. "Something funny?". He called out, ducking as a random man fired at him._

_"You look mad". Natasha called out, firing two guns in the direction of bullets, swiftly hiding again to watch Clint._

_He sighed from across the room, watching the redhead enjoy herself. "They shouldn't aim at you- it's an unfair advantage!". Clint called attempting to slow down the constant stream of bullets._

_"Come on, you and I both know I could kick their ass". She smiled rolling her eyes. "I'm just stalling them"._

_"Is that right?". Clint shouted raising his eyebrows, Natasha was never one for modesty._

_He watched as the young assassin nodded, leaning down to glance around the slab of concrete. Things had gone silent._

_It was the perfect moment for her to make a move._

_Clint watched as Natasha, sprung out from behind her hiding place- throwing her arms forward as she shot at the mob of men firing at the two of them. One by one each man fell to the floor as she quickly shot them._

_The room went silent, as Natasha grinned at Clint taking her eyes off their target._

_"See." She shouted smiling. "What did I say?"._

_Clint's smile faded as movement caught the side of his eye. Swiftly he reached behind him grabbing hold of one of his arrows raising it up to fire at the last remaining assassin._

_But it was too late._

_The man's bullet had already left the gun before Clint's arrow reached his chest._

_The loud firing sound making his stomach drop._

_He ran towards the spot where Natasha had been standing feeling his whole body go numb. She'd been shot._

_Natasha glanced up feeling a sharp feeling of pain go through her calf. It was nothing major, the bullet had just grazed her lightly, she watched a small pool of red blood swirled around her leg._

_"Nat!". Clint called, causing her to look up at him in shock. He ran towards the young woman not daring to stop for a minute. Natasha tensed feeling his arms grip tightly around her legs and shoulders lifting her up into his arms. She felt her stomach drop as their skin made contact sending sparks through her body._

_"What are you doing?". She screamed feeling her body jolt as he ran through the wreckage of the building ending up on the streets of New York. "Put me down!". She called out attempting to release herself from his arms. Put his grip remained tight as he ran further and further away from where they're mission was taking place. Fury was going to be pissed off with the both of them, for leaving the men without checking for any survivors._

_"I need to get you safely away before I put you down". Clint muttered keeping his eyes firmly on the streets ahead of him._

_Natasha sighed relaxing as she gave up on him putting her down. She smiled as she smelt his familiar warm smell swarming around her, as she leant into Clint's chest._

_Why was she acting like this? She shouldn't be so pleased at him picking her up and carrying her outside._

_Clint slowed his pace down as he spotted a empty park bench nearby, quickly he leant down to drop Natasha carefully onto the seat. Glancing at her face nervously. Friends don't act like that. Partners don't act like that._

_"Sorry." He mutter leaning towards her leg, noticing the dark stain covering her trousers._

_Swiftly he pulled up the bottom of her jeans rolling them above the wound._

_Natasha felt her face redden as she felt Clint brush past her leg._

_"Jeez Clint, stop I'm fine". She said pulling away from his hands. "At least buy me a drink first!". She shouted playfully trying to lighten the tension that had risen between them._

_Clint froze staring at the redhead below him, she smiled as she watched him walk closer to her. _

_Gently he leant down to slid his hand under her ear, gently meeting his lips against hers. He felt Natasha freeze for a second, shocked at the sudden change in mood. _

_Clint Barton was kissing her._

_Her partner, her friend. The man which she owed so much to was kissing her._

_And in that moment she realised everything she'd ever done was leading towards him._

_Deep down she knew, she'd always loved him._

_Clint broke of the kiss as he watched Natasha open her shocked eyes at him. Silently staring at him._

_"I'm so sorry". He whispered realising what he'd just done. "I should never have-_

_Natasha cut him off as she leant up to kiss Clint once more, lightly touching the side of his face. She'd never felt more sure about anything in her life. Her and Clint were meant to be together. She moved her lips against his with more passion this time, loving the way he responded against her._

* * *

Natasha gasped waking up in the huge guest room of Stark Towers.

What was that? The dream had seemed so vivid so familiar, like she was there. Her heart quickened as she felt cold tears slide down her face quickly.

"Nat?". A voice in the dark startled her a she reached over to the bedside table to turn on the glanced up as she saw Clint's body slumped in the chair next to her bed. A look of concern plastered on his face. "Are you okay?". He whispered watching the small tears slide down her face.

She watched as Clint sat upright staring at the young woman in the bed.

Pepper and her had agreed that it would be best for her to stay in Stark Towers for the night, to get to grips with everything that had happened. Natasha tried to hide the fact that she was pleased- it would be way too weird for her to go back to _their _house.

"What are you doing?". She asked watching Clint rub the back of his neck. He looked sore, obviously trying to sleep in the seat beside her bed.

Why was he in the same room as her.

"Er. I just wanted to keep an eye on you- in case anything happened". Clint stuttered embarrassed. "What's wrong?". He asked watching her shake her head.

Natasha breathed deeply closer her eyes.

There was no way she could tell him what she'd just remembered.

"It was just something Pepper told me." She muttered looking at her fingers. "A memory".

"Was it bad?". Clint whispered anxiously, leaning towards Natasha.

"No". Natasha smiled looking up at him. "It was amazing. After Pepper told me a rough outline of what happened, I remembered everything about that certain memory". She said feeling herself smile properly for the first time since she woke up. "If I keep going, I'll probably remember everything".

"Do you feel any different?". He asked, yawning. Clint was obviously tired, and sleeping in the chair wasn't going to help him.

Natasha shook her head glancing at him. "I'm going to go back to sleep". She muttered watching his reaction. Clint nodded looking down embarrassed again, not knowing what to say. "And you cant sleep in that chair Clint, you'll hurt your neck".

"Er. Okay, I guess Tony and Pepper have a spare room or something." Clint whispered standing up slowly.

Natasha rolled her eyes watching him walk away from her. "Stop being stupid. You can sleep here". She gestured to the other side of the huge bed. Clint stared at the young woman searching her face for something. "Above the covers if you're really going to act weird". She smiled turning over, to leave her back towards Clint.

She grinned turning off the lights, as she felt the bed move under Clint's weight.

He was obviously nervous sharing a bed with her, after her reaction to finding out that they were a couple.

But everything had changed.

Natasha had remembered the first time Clint had kissed her.

It wasn't like she'd made it up in her head, but it was like time had rewind itself and she was actually on the mission with him. The pain in her leg had felt real, and the feeling of his lips against hers felt real.

But she didn't feel like the woman Clint had fallen in love with- not yet. There was so many memories she had yet to find out.

So many unanswered questions.

Natasha smiled to herself as she felt her body doze off.

The familiar warm smell of Clint's skin reaching her nose as she fell asleep.

* * *

**So Natasha's beginning to remember the first part of her and Clint's relationship ;)**

**But it won't stop there, as she has some not so nice memories to discover.**

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	6. Chapter 6

**Thank you for reviewing, it means a lot!**

**The parts in _italic _are flashbacks of memories.**

**Enjoy.**

* * *

Natasha opened her eyes glancing around the huge room. She smiled preferring to wake up after a good night sleep- the dull pain in her head easing up. Glancing around her she stared at the man asleep in the bed beside her, his chest moving slowly in and out as he muttered in his sleep. Natasha grinned as she noticed how he'd chosen to sleep above the covers after all, not wanting to overstep their boundaries. Memories of their first kiss flashed in front of her eyes as she gently touched her bottom lip.

It had definitely been real. No dream could be that precise, every detail perfect.

The way she'd felt the bullet rip through her leg as she'd lost her breathe couldn't have been dreamt.

Neither could the way she felt when Clint had ran towards her.

Slowly she slid out of the bed, careful not to wake Clint up. He needed the sleep, obviously he'd been badly affected by her lose of memory.

Natasha made her way to the bathroom, as she slowly closed the door behind her.

"Miss Romanoff, I've been instructed to tell you that there are spare clothes left for you in the bottom cabinet". Jarvis spoke, startling her. Tony had probably set him to watch her movements, in case she tried to make a run for it.

"Thank you". Natasha replied softly opening the huge bathroom draws, relieving a range of clothes. Quickly she searched through the neatly folded clothes looking for something plain and comfortable.

The one thing her muscles begged for was exercise. It was the only thing that helped calm her- helped her clear her mind.

Clearly she couldn't push herself too hard, or her body wouldn't handle it. Also Clint would probably have a heart attack if he found out she'd been injured again.

Quickly she stripped off the clothes t-shirt and shorts she'd borrowed from Pepper and put on the soft vest top and tracksuit bottoms. Glancing at herself in the mirror she ignored the feeling she got again in her stomach.

She'd never get used to the way she looked now.

Natasha stared at her eyes in the mirror questioning the look that she saw in them.

Acceptance.

Slowly she pushed her feet into the spare trainers Pepper had left her and opened the door again.

Clint hadn't moved from where he was sleeping. Natasha stopped momentarily to stare at the sleeping man in the bed. He'd be worried if he woke up and she wasn't there. But clearly he needed to sleep, so there was no way she was going to disturb him. Her stomach clenched as he spoke quietly in his sleep turning onto his side.

She had to leave before she changed her mind. Quietly she left the bedroom, slowly shutting the door behind her. The bright lights of Stark Towers stung her eyes as she made her way through the living room, walking quickly through each hallway. Her hand lingered on the doorknob as she tried to tug the door open. A red light flashed on the screen above her head as she tried harder and harder to leave.

Access Denied.

"Miss Romanoff, I have been programmed to keep you inside until Mr Stark allows you to leave". Jarvis spoke causing Natasha to frown. So now she was a prisoner in Stark Towers.

"Are you serious?". She muttered under her breath turning around quickly in search of Tony. "I just want to go for a run".

The pain in her head increased as her breathing sped up.

Something was happening to her.

She blinked quickly attempting to see clearer as her room spun around her.

_"Natasha leave". Fury shouted staring at the young redhead. "Only you can end this"._

_She frowned griping onto the small staircase as the building shook around the two of them. If they didn't leave now they'd both die._

_"I can't leave you here". She shouted staring at Fury searching his eyes for the answers. Why would he want to stay in the collapsed building, after everything he'd achieved- after everyone he'd helped, he chosen to die like this? In the hands of a few bombers. "If you die, it's over". She screamed feeling her body sway against the crumbling building._

_"Agent Romanoff". Director Fury shouted across the building. "This is an order. You leave this building now, and hide. You and Barton are our only chance at survival. If you fail to follow these orders I will die for nothing. Now go!"._

_Natasha nodded finally throwing herself down the staircase, taking each step two at a time.  
_

_She could hear pieces of the ceiling fall behind her as she ran out of the building._

_Her heart felt heavy as she looked at the collapsed building behind her. The place that had once been SHIELD's warehouse._

"Natasha". Tony said standing at the doorway, watching her stubble towards him holding her head with one hand.

"Stark." She muttered glaring at him. "Why wont you let me leave?" she said ignoring the flashback she'd seen in front of her eyes, she didn't have time to question what she'd seen. All Natasha wanted to do was feel the cool fresh air on her skin.

Tony frowned walking towards her quickly. "Of course you can leave, I just told Jarvis to keep you in until I could come with you".

"What, so now you're my babysitter?". She muttered running her fingers through her long hair.

She hated the feeling of being watched. Natasha was perfectly capable of taking care of herself.

"Not at all, you can leave on your own". Tony said raising his eyebrows- he was beginning to look more like the Tony she remembered. The laid back billionaire. "I just thought you'd want some company."

* * *

Tony smiled walking through the empty paths with Natasha. They'd agreed to stay near Stark towers for the meantime just to get her back in the swing of things. The sun beat down on the pair as they walked faster keeping their eyes on the path a head.

"You know I'm not as bad as you think I am, Tony". Natasha said feeling herself become more calm in his presence.

"Huh?". Tony muttered raising his eyebrows back at her.

"I'm not as unaware of things as you think I am". She continued smiling slightly."I saw the look on your face before I fainted, and I know how panicked you are about the whole situation".

"What are you talking about. I'm Tony Stark, I don't get panicked. You must have me mistaken with another incredibly handsome billionaire hero friend". He said grinning.

"Sure. Any way after Pepper talked to me I've been beginning to remember snippets of my life". Natasha said glancing at Tony. He kept his expression blank, not wanting to interrupt her. "And I remember how me and Clint started out". She began, slowly leading up to what she wanted to talk to him about.

"Oh yeah?". He muttered, glad that she hadn't remembered any big details yet. Maybe it was better if she had forgotten.

"But there's something I wanted to ask you." She whispered staring ahead of her. "I know you'll answer me, because I remember what you used to be like Tony- although you tried to hide it, your honest, caring and don't give a crap what anyone else thinks".

Tony sighed ruffling his hair slightly. He knew he should have got Pepper to walk with Natasha.

"Fine. Go on". He said kicking himself for giving in so easily.

"Is Director Fury, dead?".

* * *

Clint woke to the harsh sunlight cutting through the curtains. Quickly he glanced around the empty guestroom in search of Natasha- but he was alone. Quickly he stood up making his way towards the door.

"Jarvis. Where's Nat?". He whispered feeling his body ache in return.

"Miss Romanoff, is out on a walk with Mr Stark. I believe they will return soon". He replied calm Clint. At least she was with Tony, he would be there to make sure no one could hurt her.

Quickly he left the spare bedroom making his way towards the dining room, where he knew he'd find Pepper.

The smell of breakfast reached his nose as he walked up to the thin woman.

"Morning Pepper". He smiled reaching down to kiss Pepper's cheek. He felt her warm arm slink around him as spoke to her.

"Hey Clint". She said leaning back to take a look at his face. "How are you feeling."

"Better". He replied forcing a fake smile onto his face. He wasn't fooling anyone. "Do you have whereabouts on _them". _Clint lowered his voice not wanting to name the people that had so far ruined his life.

Pepper frowned feeling her body run cold. "No, Jarvis is still searching but so far they've gone into hiding." She said looking at Clint's broken face. "Do you think they're coming back?"

"I know they will". He muttered leaning against the table.

"Why?". Pepper whispered.

"They'll want to finish off Natasha- not just finish her, but kill her". He said staring at Pepper, there was no way he'd ever let that happen though. Not after everything he'd been through.

* * *

**What do you think? I know there wasn't any Clintasha in this chapter, but it's a build up to something big.**

**Please REVIEW!**

**Thank you all for reading!**


	7. Chapter 7

"Yum, something smells good". Tony said under his breath walking towards the dining room with Natasha.

She rolled her eyes at him, he was obviously embarrassed about their conversation earlier- Tony was not good at braking bad news to people, especially when he knows exactly how they were going to react. So instead of actually answering her questions, he'd just stuttered a lot and made up a bunch of lies about how Fury had decided to go against orders.

"You're an idiot". She laughed watching him glare at her. As much as she wanted to pressure Tony in to answering her questions she knew he was right- the food smelt great.

Her stomach growled in agreement as the two walked towards the huge table set with a variety of different breakfast food. Everything from traditional English breakfast, to pancakes lay on huge plates before them. Pepper was definitely the cook in the group.

"Wow." She whispered eyeing the food as Tony held out a chair for her. Natasha watched as Clint and Pepper walked towards her and Tony, fake smiles on their faces. "Pepper everything looks great".

"I thought we all needed a treat, we've got a big day ahead of us". Pepper smiled sitting down next to Natasha, her golden red hair tied delicately in a loose ponytail.

Natasha watched as Clint sat down silently next to Tony, his eyes boring into hers. Something had made him more anxious than usual.

She didn't need Tony to answer her questions though.

She'd seen it for herself.

Fury was dead.

Quickly she piled a variety of different cut up fruit into a bowl and attempted to eat. Something about the atmosphere in the room made her feel uneasy.

The one thing that she knew for sure was that even if Clint never told her what she was missing in her memories- she'd find out eventually. Every second that passed was a second closer to her remembering.

But it would be a long process, and the look in Clint's eyes told her that something was going to happen _soon. _It probably all linked in with whoever caused Fury to stay in a crashing building. Nick Fury wasn't a man for suicide, and staying in that building was. Some one had caused him to throw everything away, and now Natasha was left struggling to understand the circumstances.

Fury was the one who told her what they were fighting for.

To never give up. Because as long as there was a constant stream of psychos planning to destroy the earth S.H.I.E.L.D would always be needed.

Slowly she stopped chewing the fruit and stared a head of her.

She'd lost her appetite.

Whoever killed Nick needed to pay. And she had a sneaking suspicion they had something to do with her memory loss.

"I'm going to go take a shower". She muttered standing up quickly. Natasha could feels the others stare at her, but she couldn't take it any more They were tiptoeing around her. "Thank you for the breakfast Pepper it was lovely."

Natasha hurried out of the room rushing back to her room, she needed to get away from them all. Walking towards the bathroom she stripped off her clothing turning on the shower, swiftly she got into the shower not waiting for it to get hot.

The cool water ran down her skin as Natasha bowed her head, letting her red hair get soaked, the atmosphere had confirmed her fears.

The people who had killed Fury, were still after her.

* * *

"What's going on". Tony said staring at Pepper and Clint. None of them had spoken for a while after Natasha had left and it was clear that something was bad.

"After you left, Jarvis continued to look for _them". _Pepper whispered frowning, slowly she put down her fork. Who were they kidding, all of them had lost their appetite.

"Yeah I though we'd lost them". Tony shrugged looking at Clint.

"No". He replied clenching his fists. "We haven't lost them- but we haven't found them either."

Tony sighed shaking his head. "What do you mean?".

Pepper looked at Tony sadly her eyes on the verge of tearing up. "They're moving- so we cant get a fixed location on them. But-

"But?". He cut in staring at the woman he loved. "I don't like the sound of that but".

"But every time Jarvis does spot them, they're dramatically closer to us". She whispered her voice slightly braking. Tony got up swiftly to make his way closer to Pepper.

"They won't get us". He whispered cupping Peppers face.

"How do you know that?". Clint cut in watching the couple, his face full of anger. "They'll get us first, and then Nat- there's no use sugar coating the situation."

"We'll need help". Pepper said, her eyes lighting up. "We did it once we can do it again".

"What are you suggesting?". Tony asked roughly messing up his hair.

"Who understands better than anyone, what Natasha is going through right now?". Pepper said looking from Tony to Clint, the two men watched her in confusion. "To wake up in a different time period- knowing that everything you remember and believe in, is in the past?".

"Do you think he'll come?". Clint whispered standing up.

"I know he will". Pepper smiled as Tony frowned at the two of them- their mood changing immediately.

"What makes you so sure, I thought he'd give this up". Tony said reaching down to grab a glass of water, bringing it to his lips. "He moved on with is life".

"I guess we'll see". Pepper whispered.

* * *

Natasha sighed feeling her heartbeat return to normal. The cool drops of water had calmed her nerves.

Slowly her eyes dropped down to the tan skin on her stomach.

Huge scars tainted her body as she slowly traced her finger tips over the jagged lines. Her eyes went huge as she traced the lines over her stomach leading slowly down to her back.

She'd never had this many scars and injuries before.

Slowly her eyes began to fill up as she stared down at her body.

It wasn't the same body as she was used to seeing. Instead it was the proof of someone who had been hurt. Badly.

The furious lines brought goosebumps all over her body as she finally tore her eyes away from them.

These weren't the bad wounds from an assignment.

Natasha was too good to get these many scars.

Theses were the proof of something much darker.

Torture.

Quickly she turned off the shower and wrapped herself in a white robe that hung up along the side of the bathroom door. Walking out the room Natasha realised why everyone was acting so weird about her memory loss. It wan't the fact that she'd forgotten about her and Clint.

They didn't want her to remember.

"Everything okay". Clint whispered glancing around the door.

Natasha glanced up from the floor as she nodded silently at Clint, gesturing for him to come in.

"Weren't you hungry? You barely ate anything". Clint whispered walking further into the room, before standing not to close to Natasha.

"Clint". She whispered feeling her body go numb. "You need to tell me the truth."

Clint looked at Natasha feeling his face grow pale. "Okay". He said nervously, not wanting her to continue.

"This whole mess isn't because you're afraid I don't remember the memories of us together, is it?". She spoke calmly watching his eyes dart from her face back to the floor. "It's because you don't want me to remember the very thing, that hurt me so much".

"What do you mean?". He muttered walking closer to her.

"Tell me the truth." She said feeling her body shake slightly. "The truth about how I got these scars on my body".

"Nat.." Clint said trying desperately to calm the redhead.

"No." She shouted walking away from him. "Don't do that, don't pretend that everything's okay because we both know that's not true".

Natasha sat down on the edge of the bed, feeling her head spin. A tear escaped from her eye as she bowed her head, furiously wiping it away.

How could she be so vulnerable?

Let herself get into a position like this.

"I'm so sorry Nat". Clint said sitting next to her, his voice wobbling slightly. "I never wanted you to get hurt".

"I hate this so much". Natasha whispered pulling her head into her hands, watching her wet hair fall around her face. "Not knowing 3 years of my life."

Clint felt his stomach drop as he watched the small woman brake down.

Swiftly he wrapped his arms around her small frame, for once not caring about how forward he seemed. "I'm so sorry". He whispered feeling her head lean against his shoulders. Slowly he leant his head down to kiss the top of her head lightly. His eyes stinging as he tried to stay calm. "I will do everything in my power to keep you safe."

Natasha shut her eyes feeling safe. She rested her head under his chin feeling the fast pace of his heartbeat.

He was nervous.

"I'm so sorry". He whispered. "I love you so much".

Natasha sighed wishing she could say it back to him. But she couldn't. "I know". She whispered, knowing he would be hurt at her reply. "But I think I need to be on my own". She said pulling away from him.

Clint nodded hating himself for telling her he loved her. She probably felt so uncomfortable.

Swiftly he left the room, shutting the door carefully behind him.

The next time he saw Natasha he would tell her everything. It was only fair. Hiding this from her had caused her too much pain and if she was going to face _them _she needed to know everything.

* * *

**So, what did you think? I know it's a little bit sad- but anyone in Natasha's position would be sad.**

**Please REVIEW.**

**Next time you'll find out who really is causing the Avengers so much trouble.**

**Thank you!**


	8. Chapter 8

**Sorry for the delay, school has stopped me from writing.**

**This chapter was hard to write, I had a writers block. So hopefully it's okay.**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

Pepper stood at Natasha's door not wanting to enter, she'd been through enough for one day. But as much as they all wanted to let her recover, there was no time to waste. The attackers were descending on their tracks, and fast, they needed Natasha to be back to her normal state- so she could defend herself if something were to happen to them.

Quickly she knocked lightly on her door, and entered the young woman's room once more.

Her eyes drifted to the hunched up figure by the window, staring out into the sky like before. Somehow Pepper knew that she couldn't make Natasha smile like she did before. There was too much pain in her eyes.

"Natasha". Pepper whispered causing the young woman to flinch. "There's some one here to see you. I think you'll want to hear what he says".

"Why?". Natasha muttered not looking at Pepper, her eyes darting from the window down to her legs.

"Because I know what you're going through". Steve whispered standing behind Pepper.

Natasha turned to face Steve, scared of how different he would look.

But to her relief Steve looked exactly the same. His tan skin the same warm colour making his blue eyes stand out. Strands of his blonde hair falling over his forehead- the rest combed neatly behind. The clothes Steve wore still looked outdated, but suited him.

Natasha smiled as her whole body relaxed at the sight of Steve.

The man out of time.

The sweet gentle man, who had lost everything- but still managed to defend the world.

"Steve!". Natasha smiled turning her body to face the kind man.

Pepper grinned walking out of the room quickly, the two needed their space together.

Steve shuffled further towards Natasha slowly, his cheeks blushing delicately. He was uncomfortable.

"So, I heard about what happened Nat". Steve said sitting on the bed quickly. His eyes darting up to Natasha. "And I just want to do whatever I can to make you feel better".

Natasha sighed hating herself for having to ask everyone the same question.

"How did I lose my memory?". She whispered staring at Steve waiting for his expression to turn dark, the way everyone else's did. But he didn't change.

"Sorry. I don't know". Steve said raising his eyebrows.

"You don't know?". Natasha frowned confused now more than ever, all she wanted to do was remember.

"Nat. I haven't seen you in years".

Natasha blinked feeling herself shake slightly. "What?". She whispered needing him to continue. "Steve how could you not have seen me for years?".

Steve blushed knowing that he'd caused her discomfort.

"Do you want me to tell you everything that happened when I was last with you?".

"Everything after Loki's attack". She whispered softly.

She needed clarity.

To remember the things she'd forgotten.

The more others told her the more she seemed to subconsciously remember.

"Okay. Sure." Steve smiled slightly linking his fingers together nervously. "After Loki's attack, I became a full time agent with S.H.I.E.L.D". Steve whispered his forehead wrinkling. "You might have guessed that I didn't really fit in there. The methods were far too modern for me". He grinned looking up at Natasha. "I was finding life in this world so hard. I felt so alone".

"I'm so sorry Steve". Natasha whispered feeling bad for the pain which he must have felt.

"It's fine." Steve smiled. "One day on a mission, I met this incredible woman." Steve blushed looking down. "Her name was Sharon, and I just knew in that instant that she was the one- and I felt complete. Like there was a reason I was kept alive in the ice. A purpose for me being here. Everything I could ever want was put into retrospective."

"So what did you do?". Natasha replied eager to hear more.

"I quit." Steve said looking up at the red head. "I told Fury that I needed some time off- and that I'd help if the world depended on it".

"You quit?". Natasha frowned staring down. "But why? Your job meant so much to you Steve. You were helping the world".

"I once agreed with what you're saying Natasha, but it's so different now". Steve smiled. "I can still help the world, but have my life fulfilled at the same time."

"What should I do?". Natasha whispered fiddling with her hair.

"There's no easy to say this. But when I woke up in the future, I just had to move on- to adapt. It's hard but you just have to stay strong". Steve said shaking his head.

* * *

It had been a couple of hours since Steve had talked to Natasha. Pepper, Tony and Clint sat in the large living room sitting in silence, waiting for Natasha to leave her room.

"Do you think Steve helped?". Clint whispered staring at Natasha.

"I hope so, he's the only person that she can relate to". Pepper sighed leaning into Tony's arm, tired after the long stressful days.

Tony smirked staring at Pepper. "It was a blast from the past seeing Cap again". He laughed pulling Pepper into his arms. "It's hard to believe that it was actually easier then".

"Once she's feeling better we can leave". Pepper mumbled closing her eyes as she rested her head on Tony's chest. "Find somewhere safe to stay".

Natasha stood at the edge of the door way watching the three adults.

"Why?". She whispered causing them all to jump slightly. "Please tell me what's going on." Slowly she walked towards the three shocked looking people, deciding to sit on a separate sofa next to Clint. "I'm feeling fine."

The room went silent as they all looked for the right words to say.

"Okay." Clint said looking at his fingers. "You deserve the truth".

"We're in trouble". Tony spoke staring into Natasha's eyes, his face deadly serious.

"With who?". She whispered attempting to keep the face calm. Although she already knew the answers.

"The same people that hurt you". Pepper said softly, touching Tony's hand nervously. "The same people that-

"Scarred me". Natasha cut in bluntly. She needed to prove how much better she is, that would be the only way they would tell her everything. "What do they want?".

"You". Clint whispered turning to Natasha, his face full of pain.

Natasha stared at him, knowing he was probably reliving the moments she was tortured.

"Why did they torture me? Because I'm a S.H.I.E.L.D agent?". Natasha spoke quickly, ignoring the pained expressions. "Was a S.H.I.E.L.D agent" She corrected herself swiftly.

"So you remember that S.H.I.E.L.D no longer exists?". Tony asked raising an eyebrow. Natasha nodded indicating for him to continue. "How much more do you remember?".

"I remember the time that Fury died". She whispered numbly. "I was there when the building went down."

"What did he say?". Clint said urgently, leaning forward towards the redhead.

"He-he told me to leave the building. Because only you and I could finish what he wanted". Natasha frowned not making sense of what Fury had told her before he died in the falling building. "But I don't know what he was talking about."

A loud alarm sound filled the room.

"Sir?". Jarvis interrupted causing Natasha to jump slightly, the atmosphere had grown heavy while she was speaking.

"Are they close Jarvis?". Tony leant up nervously his eyes fixed on the ceiling.

"Yes. I'm afraid I would advise you to leave the building". Jarvis replied, making Natasha grow pale.

"The people who want me dead?". She whispered standing up slowly. "They're here".

"No!". Pepper said moving across the room to pick up huge bags full of supplies. "We've been tracking their movements- and we set up Jarvis to inform us when it would be too risky to stay in the building."

Clint walked over to Natasha staring at her dead in the eyes."What do we do now?". She whispered, feeling her self lose control.

"We run and hide until you remember". Clint said, holding her shoulders tightly. "But we wont let them get close to you."

"Why do they want me so much?". She said her anger rising.

She hated the fact that she was putting everyone in danger.

Causing them to leave their homes.

Tony ran towards Clint and Natasha urging them to move.

"They want the information that Fury gave you, Natasha". He said pulling her along. "But you cant give it to them".

* * *

**Please Review! It help me get inspiration to write. And let's me know you liked the chapter!**

**Thank you!**


	9. Chapter 9

**I don't know if anyone is still reading this story, and I cant apologise enough for the delay. But my exams are over, so I have much more time to start writing again. Thanks for the messages urging me to continue, I hope this chapter is okay. Again, I'm sorry for the absence in chapters! This chapter is going to contain a lot of action, but it is vital to the storyline! I hope you enjoy it.**

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Natasha watched as Tony and Pepper scrambled with suitcases full of supplies, the loud chime of the alarms still ringing in her ears.

Her muscles tensed as she felt Clint pull her gently to follow Pepper, his hand firmly on her waist.

This was happening.

The people who wanted her dead, the same people who had tortured her for information that she no longer knew were close. "Nat! Can you hear what I'm saying". Clint shouted bringing her back to reality. "We have to go now." He said pulling her into a black car that Tony probably owned.

"What about Tony and Pepper, aren't they coming with us?". She shouted watching Clint run around the shiny car, sliding into the drivers seat.

"They're going to follow us in a separate car." He whispered pulling out of the huge drive way.

Behind them Natasha could see another black car identical to the one she was in. Pepper and Tony were creating a diversion.

"How far are they going to stay with us?". She whispered watching Clint accelerate further down the road, his eyes set on the road ahead. "Barton! You have to tell me."

Barton.

That did it for him. It dawned on Natasha that she probably hadn't called him Barton in years. Since their _relationship. _The hurt in his eyes was obvious.

"Tony's going to follow us for a couple of miles before following a different route." He replied facing the redhead. His calm exposure disappearing. Clint was scared, it was clear to Natasha how much she meant to him.

"What route, where are they going?". Natasha said turning around in her seat to watch the black car behind them.

"I don't know." He whispered speeding the car up. They were losing valuable time.

Natasha frowned glancing at Clint quickly. "You don't know, or you don't want to know." She whispered angrily. "By doing this they're risking their lives for us".

"Look Nat. There's no other way to do this- to keep you safe.". He said resisting the urge to hold her hand. "Tony and Pepper aren't just doing this for us. They're doing this for the world."

The world.

Nothing had ever felt more out of control than the Loki attack, yet here she was again. Attempting to defend the world from an enemy that she didn't even remember.

Natasha's eyes wondered through the buildings of New York as the two cars sped through the streets.

Something felt odd, like there was something that she was missing.

Some detail that she couldn't put her finger on.

And then she saw it. A small shine of light that hit her face for just a second to make her notice something in the distance; on top of one of the tall buildings. Quickly Natasha pressed her body against the window squinting will her eyes to focus on the tall figure on the building. It was a person.

"Clint. There's someone on top of that building." She whispered staring at the blurry figure. If only they weren't going so fast she'd be able to make out what the person was doing on the building.

Slowly the picture became clear.

In the persons hand was a long aiming gun.

Pointed right at them.

"Clint they can see us!". She shouted pulling the wheel out of Clint's grip, swerving the car into the opposite direction.

"Where are they?". He shouted braking harshly, causing the tires to screech loudly against the rough ground.

"On top of the building!". Natasha said quickly spinning around in her seat once more. "We have to warn Pepper and Tony".

As soon as the words were out of her mouth Natasha watched as multiple fires where shot at the black car following them. The car swerved a couple of times as Tony attempted to dodge the bullets but it was no use, there was too many shots firing through the air. Immediately a piercing noise of shattering glass evaded the air as the black car exploded behind them, shards of metal and glass flying in all directions. She watched as the car itself tore off the ground and flipped onto it's back, bright orange flames escaping it's bonnet.

All she could think was of the two people trapped inside the car.

The kindest people she knew.

"Oh my god". She breathed staring at the overturned car in the distance. There was no way Clint would let her go back, not when they could lose so much more. "They're dead."

Whoever was after them had made it personal, killing everyone Natasha ever cared about until she would be left alone.

"I'm sorry". Clint whispered speeding the car up, taking them further away from the wreckage which Tony and Pepper where trapped in. "But we have to stop this before anyone else dies."

Natasha turned around slumping down in the soft seat.

No emotion distracting her. This is what she'd been taught all those years ago.

Stay distant and you cant get hurt.

Don't cry.

The same flash of light caught her eye as Natasha watched the figure on top of the building still tracking them.

Quickly she leant down to search through the glove compartment of the car willing to find any sort of weapon. "What are you looking for?". Clint whispered glancing down at Natasha.

"A gun." She mumbled scrambling through various papers and trash. "I'm going to kill that son of a bitch on the building."

"Is he still watching us?". Clint asked staring at Natasha who nodded fiercely back at him. "Okay, there's a gun in my pocket. You'll have to get it because I cant take my eyes off the road, we're going too fast."

"Which side?". Natasha whispered leaning over Clint, her hands lightly touching the pockets of his jeans, before landing on the cool hard object she'd longed for. "Got it." She said loading the gun quickly.

Swiftly Natasha opened the window of the car fully before leaning her torso out, forcing her eyes onto the target on the building. She could hear the shots of bullets aiming at their tires- trying to force them to stop.

"This is for Pepper and Tony you ass-holes". She whispered pulling the trigger several time, her training coming into good use. She watched as the figure on the building fell away from sight. Dead. "Got him". Natasha said climbing back into the seat closing the window, the gun still firmly in her hand.

It was quiet as the car continued to speed through the streets of New York. It was easier without the constant stream of bullets aiming for the tires of Tony's car. But Natasha couldn't shake the feeling that had entered her body since she watched Tony and Pepper's car get attacked.

It wasn't supposed to be like this.

They were supposed to fight. To remain as a team- to fight together.

But somehow they'd managed to destroy everything.

Three of the team already dead.

SHIELD gone. No backup. They didn't have a good chance.

"Once we get to a safe place, you're going to tell me what was so important that Fury gave his life up. Why these people are after us." Natasha said to Clint staring ahead of her. It wasn't a question. He had to tell her the answers. Everything had changed, it was personal now. "Where exactly are we going anyway?". She whispered willing herself to sound less cold, less harsh.

"We need to visit Bruce Banner. It's not going to be safe for long, but he has something we need." Clint whispered, licking his lips nervously. There was only so long he could pretend that he didn't just witness the death of two of his closest friends.

"What does he have?". Natasha whispered calmly glancing at Clint.

"Something to bring your memory back".

* * *

**Please REVIEW, I have no idea how many of you are still reading this fic. **

**What do you think? Believe me thing's are not what they seem ;)**

**Thank you for reading!**


	10. Chapter 10

**Thank you for all of the reviews. I'm glad you guys are still reading this story! This will have the introduction to the villain which is chasing Natasha and Clint, all will be explained to why Natasha is so special in the next couple of chapters! I hope you like this chapter!**

* * *

The sun was setting as Natasha leant her head against the window, all signs of New York disappearing. They'd been driving for hours and hadn't seen any signs of civilisation for miles- that's how she knew they were close to finding Bruce. The car continued down the long sandy path as the pair sat in comfortable silence, both needing time to reflect on what had happened with Tony and Pepper.

Maybe they'd somehow made it out alive, with some highly intellectual machine that could have saved them from a situation like that.

Surely Jarvis could have sent a suit for Tony?

The fire would have taken a couple of seconds to reach the engine before exploding.. maybe that was enough time.

Who was she kidding.

Natasha rolled her eyes, she was being so pathetic. As much as she loved making up lame excuses to believe that Tony and Pepper weren't dead, it was only making her angrier.

These people were taunting her, laughing at how easy it was to get a reaction out of her.

"We're nearly there". Clint mumbled clearing his throat. It had meant to sound reassuring like Bruce would have all the answers to their problems, but Clint wasn't fooling anyone. The mess they were in was deep.

Natasha thought back to earlier- when Clint had comforted her. Told her that he loved her.

Maybe before the accident she would have said it back.

"I'm sorry". She whispered glancing at him through the shadows in the car, her voice rough.

Clint smiled back his face warm. "What for?".

"For this!". She said holding out her arms. "All of this. It would be so much easier if I could remember everything."

"Nat. You will remember everything. Once we get to Bruce, I'll tell you everything I know- and Bruce will help you unlock the rest". Clint whispered taking one hand off the wheel to hold Natasha's.

It felt familiar- comforting.

"It's not just that". Natasha whispered linking her fingers with Clint's. "I'm sorry I'm not the same woman that you fell in love with. I'm sorry for everything I've put you through".

Clint stayed quiet for a couple of seconds before answering, contemplating whether or not to answer. "I'm not sure if you knew this before the accident Nat". He whispered licking his lips nervously. "I've always loved you- every version of you".

Slowly he dropped her hand before turning his attention back to the road.

He wasn't going to force anything on her.

The roads got thinner as the car moved on at high speed, ahead in the distance Natasha noticed a small wooden hut similar to the one she'd arranged to meet Bruce in when asking for his assistance with the Loki problem.

Clint slowed down the car as they reached the small house.

"Here goes nothing". He smiled getting out of the car.

Natasha followed his lead as they walked up to the door. It was so quiet here, no sound of animals. Nothing.

Lightly Clint knocked three times on the door, before stepping back slightly. His forehead wrinkling with stress. There was no signs that they had been followed, so they'd be safe for the night.

The door opened slowly as Bruce peered through the gap his face worried.

"It's us". Clint whispered making Natasha's stomach drop. Why were they acting so strange.

"Crap". Bruce said opening the door wider to let the two in. "Thank god you're alive." He whispered smiling sadly his eyes huge with shock. "I'm glad somebody made it." Bruce made room, allowing Natasha to walk through into the small house, his eyes watching her nervously.

The room was small with a tiny table with four chairs, a small cabin sofa opposite a television and a kitchen in the same room.

Natasha walked further into the room sitting anxiously onto the wooden chair.

"How many of us is there left?". Bruce whispered standing with Clint in the doorway, his head bent low.

Natasha watched as Clint ran his fingers through his hair. Only then did she notice how exhausted he looked, dark circles underlined his eyes. "It's just us." He whispered sadly, his voice shaking slightly.

"Shit." Bruce answered folding his arms across his chest. "We don't have much time before they reach us."

"Clint said you had something that could bring back my memories?". Natasha whispered interrupting the two men. "I think we should do it as fast as possible".

Bruce nodded once before walking over to the small cabinet in the corner.

It became clear to Natasha the reason why no one would tell her what happened.

They didn't know everything.

"This is a small serum that I invented". Bruce said looking at Natasha nervously. "It helps to reassign the brain tissue to it's former self. In theory it should help you remember everything."

"In theory?". Clint said walking towards Natasha protectively. "How do we know if it's going to cause some sort of reaction?".

"Clint. I'll be fine". Natasha smiled, standing up confidently.

"Okay- right. Well I think it would be better if you lay down of the sofa, the serums going to cause you to lose consciousness." Bruce said quickly his cheeks blushing slightly. "Just remember Natasha, your memories not going to come back like that". He said clicking his fingers. "It's going to take time".

"Okay. Let's do it". Natasha said laying down on the cabin sofa her arm pointed towards Bruce. The sharp prick of the needle caused her to wince slightly as she felt her body go numb. The effects of the serum taking place on her body. Slowly she fell asleep, her red hair splayed across the pillow as her breathing slowed down.

"Do you think it's going to work Doc?". Clint said kneeling beside the woman he loved, stroking her hair softly.

"I hope so. It's the last chance we have of winning". Bruce whispered.

* * *

_(Natasha's last memory of Fury)_

_"Agent Romanoff. Can I have a few minuets please?". Fury said standing in the doorway of Natasha's office. It had been a quiet year after Loki's attack. All other missions had felt so easy once you've defeated a demi god._

_"Of course". Natasha said standing up quickly, together the two walked in silence as they entered a emptier part of SHIELD's headquarters. "Is there something wrong?"._

_Fury was silent for a few seconds as Natasha analysed his expression. She'd never seen him like this. It was almost like there was a situation that he couldn't control._

_"Everything as we know it, is about to change." Fury said staring at the young woman. "Ever since the attack on New York there have been groups of highly trained individuals planning to take us down."_

_Fury pulled out a chair for Natasha letting her sit down, she watched as he pulled out a brown file full of information._

_"This isn't like before. I don't have a plan to stop them." He said raising an eyebrow at Natasha. _

_"What do you mean? What can make them so strong that we cant stop them." She said frowning at Fury, there must be a logical explanation for why he was acting like this._

_Fury sighed before taking out a picture from the file. "Have you ever seen this man before?"._

_Natasha stared at the picture of the dark haired man, his grey eyes staring back at her. She'd never seen him in her life. Quickly she shook her head allowing Fury to continue._

_"His name is Arthur Grey, he trained with SHIELD a few years back. He was a forensic scientist before we recruited him, his speciality included the human genome." Fury said glancing at the photo. "The reason you haven't heard of him is because he was let go, before you joined. We found his methods- too sadistic." He said frowning._

_Sadistic?_

_"What did he do to make you fire him?". Natasha whispered feeling her skin crawl. Maybe she didn't want to know the answer._

_"He abducted the subjects we were after. But instead of killing them, or holding them captive. He- well I guess you could call it experiments."._

_Natasha grimaced. "He experimented on humans." _

_"Arthur Grey created a deadly virus which he would inject into the subjects blood stream, causing extreme hallucinations and eventual death." Fury said slowly. "He was once one of our top agents. But now he's out to destroy everything that we built."_

_"Why cant we find him? Put an end to the destruction before it begins." Natasha said leaning towards Fury._

_"Because the last fifteen agents I've sent after him have died." Fury said firmly. "I cant risk losing any more- let alone my top agents."_

_"What's going to happen?". Natasha whispered. _

_"Grey is going to destroy Shield, he has plans of infecting the water supplies of the world- becoming the most powerful son of a bitch with a cure. Eventually he'll sell the cure on, to the highest bidder. The devastation he'll cause would be catastrophic, but Grey know's the only way he can successfully do this is by killing everyone that could potentially stand in his way. All of you."_

_"So in order to stop him we need to steal the cure from Grey?". Natasha said standing up quickly._

_"No Agent Romanoff. You need to steal the cure." _

_"What about you, we can't do this without you." Natasha said turning to face Fury. "I have no idea what to do without you"._

_A loud explosion shook the building as Natasha fell to the floor, she felt Fury pull her up gently as the ground shook beneath their feet. _

_Bombs._

_"This is him Natasha. He's always one step a head- if he know's I'm alive he'll kill more people than necessary." Fury shouted covering Natasha from the falling pieces of ceiling. "It'll be too much"._

_Natasha frowned feeling the whole building shake once more. It wouldn't be long before the walls collapsed. "But I know nothing about this guy! How am I supposed to steal the cure, when I don't even know where he is."_

_"Take this." Fury shouted thrusting the file full of information into Natasha's hands firmly. "It has everything you need to stop him. He doesn't know who you are, you wont suspect you coming."  
_

_"But without you SHIELD will be destroyed." Natasha screamed ignoring the instinct she had to run out of the building._

_"It needs to be destroyed". Fury said grabbing the red heads arms. "Grey needs to believe that he's won. Only then will he let his guard down."_

_"I cant." Natasha whispered slowly._

_"He's going to kill everyone if you don't stop him. Tony, Steve, Bruce- Clint!". Fury shouted. "As long as you are all alive and fighting with SHIELD. He will be after you. Create diversion, hide- stay under the radar. You need to convince him that none of you are a team. Do whatever you have too. Move to different countries- fake deaths, just don't try to kill him until you've got the cure"._

_"Why me?". Natasha screamed. "I'm just an assassin." _

_"You have no idea how special you are. Now go!". Fury said staring at Natasha._

_Another explosion rippled through the building as Natasha ran towards the stair case._

_"Natasha leave". Fury shouted staring at the young redhead. "Only you can end this"._

_She frowned griping onto the small staircase as the building shook around the two of them. If they didn't leave now they'd both die._

_"I can't leave you here". She shouted staring at Fury searching his eyes for the answers. Why would he want to stay in the collapsed building, after everything he'd achieved- after everyone he'd helped, he chosen to die like this? In the hands of a few bombers. "If you die, it's over". She screamed feeling her body sway against the crumbling building._

_"Agent Romanoff". Director Fury shouted across the building. "This is an order. You leave this building now, and hide. You and Barton are our only chance at survival. If you fail to follow these orders I will die for nothing. Now go!"._

_Natasha nodded finally throwing herself down the staircase, taking each step two at a time.  
_

_She could hear pieces of the ceiling fall behind her as she ran out of the building._

_Her heart felt heavy as she looked at the collapsed building behind her. The place that had once been SHIELD's warehouse._

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**So maybe that gives you a little bit of an understanding to why everyone is acting so ****suspicious. I know that might have been a little bit confusing, but the parts in _italic_ are memories induced by Bruce's serum. Every memory will eventually come back- so things will become a lot clearer. Please REVIEW! Thanks for reading!**

**P.s If you have any questions or tips PM me!**


	11. Chapter 11

**I have no idea if anyone is still reading this fic- because I've not written a chapter in ages! And I cant apologize enough! I'm so sorry! I hope you still enjoy this story and I'll try to upload chapters more frequently! x**

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Natasha opened her eyes staring at the wooden roof above her. The serum Bruce had injected her with had worked- she'd remembered more of Fury's death.

And the person who caused it.

Arthur Grey.

A sadistic ex-agent who planned to infect New York with a disease that would cause hysteria and halluitions until the city it's ripped each other to shreds.

Her last orders from Fury, was to steal the cure before things got out of control. Had she managed to do it? Is that why numerous people were trying to kill them.

Her heart dropped as the images of Tony's car exploding came back into her mind.

Tony and Pepper were dead.

"Clint. We need to do this now". Bruce's whispering voice interrupted her thought. Natasha glance around the small room before her eyes landed on the two men in the corner. Both looking equally exhausted.

"This is unmoral and you know it. How are you even sure it's going to work". Clint whispered furiously back, his fingers clenched tightly by his legs.

Natasha frowned watching the two men. What did Bruce say to make Clint react so badly- they were supposed to be in this together, and here they were, obviously hiding information from her?

Bruce shook his head softly, a small smile escaping his lips. "I know it's going to work, because she said it would".

"Did I steal the cure?". Natasha's rough voice caused her to cringe- she sounded so tired. The two men spun around surprised at her interruption. She sat up slowly running her fingers through her hair; she glanced up at Clint waiting for him to answer. "Well?" She questioned raising her eyebrows. "Did I do it?"

"So you remember? Yes. You managed to steal the cure". Clint whispered walking towards the couch. "I have no idea how the hell you managed to do it, but you found that son of a bitch- Grey, and stole the cure to his 'infection'".

Natasha sat up straight, turning from Clint to Bruce. "You should have told me what we were dealing with. So where is it? We need to find it before Grey infects the whole city!"

"That's the thing." Bruce said biting his lips. "We don't know where you put it".

"You don't know where I put it!" She shouted standing up furiously. "Well that's just perfect. Why didn't I tell you?" Silence drifted through the room once more as the blood pounded through Natasha's veins. The whole of New York City was going to die if she didn't remember where she hid the cure.

"You sent out a list of instructions to each of us before you're accident- telling us that you'd planned everything precisely to stop Grey." Clint said clearly, his eyes fixed on the floor. "You told us that you'd hidden the cure in a safe place- and that this was the only way to stop Grey. To keep us safe you didn't tell us anything. We didn't even know how big this was until your accident."

"I guess we only have one option." Bruce whispered. "Continue with the serum, until you remember".

Natasha felt her heart drop. Not only did they not know when Arthur Grey was planning to infect the city's water supply, they had no idea how many attempts it would take for Natasha to remember where the cure was.

"How long could it take?" Clint said staring at Bruce.

"Weeks maybe months". Bruce muttered rubbing his eyes.

"Grey's going to infect the water soon- he thinks we have the cure and it's only a matter of time before he realizes that we have nothing and can't stop him".

We? Natasha stared at Bruce and Clint, the two men struggling to keep their eyes open. They didn't deserve any of this.

"What if I took a concentrated dose?" Natasha whispered quickly. Why hadn't she thought of this before? If she took a larger dose of Bruce's serum she would hopefully be able to remember everything.

Bruce shook his head quickly, pacing up and down the small room.

"I don't know, it doesn't sound good Nat". He whispered frowning. "I have no idea the effects it could have on your body let alone your mind".

"Bruce, can we have a minute alone please?" Clint interrupted standing up slowly, his eyes focused on Natasha.

Bruce stared at Clint sadly before walking outside, fear in his eyes.

Natasha watched as Clint walked silently towards her, she could feel her breathing increase. She knew that he was going to attempt to stop her from doing this.

"I know what you're going to say". She sighed staring up at Clint.

"I think you should do it" Clint said brushing Natasha's hair away from her eyes. She watched as his hand froze. "Sorry."

"It's okay". She whispered leaning into his hand ignoring the familiar feeling in her stomach. This really wasn't the time to get close to Clint, but Natasha couldn't bear to move. She'd never noticed the color of Clint's eyes before; blue in one light- green in another, always changing.

Natasha shut her eyes as she leant into Clint's body, his arms wrapping around her small frame. She breathed in his familiar smell as her hands slid up towards his hair. Why couldn't she just remember- then she wouldn't have to put Clint in danger.

. She could feel herself trembling against him, but didn't care- everyone had their limits.

"I just want to fix this". She whispered leaning back to look at Clint's eyes again. They looked darker than usual. Slowly she pulled away from his grip turning the opposite way, her heart beating fast.

Clint watched as the redhead walked slowly away from him before squeezing his eyes shut. Natasha wanted to remember, and to hell if he wasn't going to try everything.

"Nat?" Clint said slowly walking behind her, his pulse increasing.

He had no idea how she was going to take this. The end result would probably be a right hook to his face- but he didn't care. The woman he loved needed help.

Clint pulled softly on the redheads arm spinning her around, swiftly meeting his lip with hers. He could feel the shock of surprise go through her body as he lightly touched her cheek, his hands stroking her hair.

And in that moment she knew why they'd made it for so long as a couple.

It was always him.

Natasha closed her eyes and responded to his touch sliding her hands around his neck, each touch familiar. Memories swarmed through her mind as she kissed Clint. It became so clear what she had to do.

The pair broke apart as Natasha slowly opened her eyes, the blood pumping through her veins.

"I'm sorry, I had to try". Clint said his cheeks reddening under her calculating stare. "It's just that- thought it might help, you know you hear stories-

"Clint." Natasha interrupted frowning.

"Yeah?"He whispered quietly, embarrassed at the circumstances he'd put them both in.

"Shut up." Natasha whispered pulling his head back towards her, the kiss was more urgent this time. She needed this- needed to feel him. Her partner. The man she loved.

"Uh- guys?" Bruce interrupted causing the two to spring apart, his cheeks going red. "Sorry. But you might want to see this."

Bruce quickly walked over to the small TV on the coffee table his eyes not meeting Natasha's. The screen lit up as Bruce frantically turned into onto the right channel.

"What's going on?" Clint whispered following Natasha as the three stood next to the TV. On the screen appeared a regular news broadcasting.

"Panic is spreading through the streets of New York City, as a deadly gas has spread through the water systems". The news anchor spoke discomfort obvious on her face. "It is unknown how many people are infected, but all we can say is the gas is spreading through the water supply and has now become airborne- If anyone has any information concerning the infection or how to stop it, please ring the number on screen now. We are advising citizens to stay inside their homes until further information is received. We've just had news that those infected are highly volatile and may see distressing hallucinations causing them to lash out violently, if you or someone you know is infected quarantine them immediately".

"Jesus." Clint whispered rubbing his face with both hands.

"What do we do now?" Bruce said breathing deeply attempting to calm his heart rate. The last thing they needed was an outburst from the other guy.

"We don't really have a choice now do we?" Natasha said staring at the two men. After everything she'd been through she was surprisingly calm. "We have to turn ourselves in."

Clint frowned shaking his head. "He'll kill us."

"Exactly" She said sighing. "The whole reason this guy is doing this, is because he wants to take down SHIELD. We're the only ones left- without us SHIELD is gone. We can make a deal- our lives in return for the cities."

"What about the cure?" Bruce whispered his forehead wrinkling with stress.

"We don't need it- our deaths will be enough for Grey." Natasha said sternly her mind set. "But only _ours_ Bruce. You have nothing to do with this, you're not a SHIELD agent.". She said walking up to the sweet man. "You don't need to die". She whispered smiling slightly.

"What?". He whispered gulping, his eyes glancing from Natasha to Bruce. "Please."

"Clint. Can you pack the car we need to go." Natasha said quickly her eyes never leaving Bruce's.

Clint nodded quickly gathering the bags as he walked out of the small wooded house. It seemed fair for Bruce to live- there was no one else as deserving as him. At least with him alive he might be able to help those already infected in New York.

His hands felt cold as he lifted the last of the bags into the car, his heart still racing from the kiss.

Did it help in anyway? Did Natasha remember.

Slowly he walked back inside Bruce's house his throat dry.

His eyes found Natasha and Bruce talking quietly in the corner of the room.

"All right we're all set." He said smiling tightly at the two, his face forced. "Thanks for everything man." He hugged Bruce tightly, before leaving. He was never great and goodbyes.

Natasha stayed behind for a few seconds staring at Bruce, his eyes tearing up slightly.

"Natasha." He whispered. "How do you know this will work."

Natasha smiled before walking towards the door. Who knew a kiss could do that much.

"Because I remember where I put the cure." She whispered staring at Bruce. "I have the cure."

* * *

**So if you didn't already guess, yes Natasha has know remembered where she put the cure. But it doesn't mean that everything is entirely okay (Just because she has the cure doesn't mean the'll be safe from the infection..) Please Review! Hopefully it's not too complicated! I love you all! Thank you.**


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